Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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