I wish my penis had an off switch
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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