Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
