YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
