So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
