I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
