I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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