is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
