Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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