i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
