fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
