So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
