There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize