Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I think I won the penis lottery.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
