Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
