Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize