I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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