soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
