Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
