I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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