we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
