went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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