I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Randomize
