so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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