im gay
i know
yea but for you.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Randomize
