i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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