U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Randomize
