if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
You are a genius and a whore.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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