you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
