I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize