my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
