Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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