my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
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