I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize