i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
