drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
