Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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