it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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