got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I love you. Go after that dick
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
