I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Randomize
