Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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