How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
