Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
