Define "chronic" masturbator.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
i think my cat just said my name.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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