Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
His hands were made for my vagina.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
