I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
