nut hugger
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
