Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
It's shark week go big or go home
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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