honey bunches of taint.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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