Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Drake has all the answers
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
